Happy father’s day
Tomorrow is the kids’ first day of school and I really ought to sleep early. But I cannot let Father’s Day end without posting something I had been reserving for over a week.
It isn’t just Father’s Day today. It is also Speedy’s birthday. Speedy, the man I met some forty pounds ago and who became my husband and the father of Sam and Alex. He is an extraordinary man — sometimes funny, sometimes naive, sometimes infuriating but nevertheless endearing for all his imperfections.
When I was seven months pregnant with Alex, my water broke a little before midnight. I was lying in bed and, not wanting to wake up Sam, I spoke without moving.
“Speedy, pumutok na yung tubig ko,” I said.
“Patayin mo yung gripo,” he answered while half-asleep.
He didn’t even feel that the mattress was soaked. He was a heavy sleeper then — Sam’s wailing in the middle of the night didn’t rouse him unless someone shook him bodily — and he’s still the same way now.
But that didn’t really make him an ineffective father. Speedy has always been a hands-on father. He did not balk at chores like bottle-feeding the babies or changing their diapers. He did the laundry and he washed the bottles. In many ways, he was not a traditional Filipino father.
But, in other ways, he is a traditional Filipino father too. He is very protective of our daughters; sometimes, I think, to the point of being overprotective because they are girls. He used to say he would point his gun at any boy who comes to the house to visit the girls. He knows better now. He understands now that being protective, as a way of showing his love, should never be an excuse to refuse to give the girls a chance to grow up and live life. These days, he can even manage to laugh — with genuine amusement — when he hears stories about boys and crushes.
We met forty pounds ago. When we were dating, I gave him a bag of cheese cookies that I baked. I was very, very bad at baking and those cookies were an achievement. He took a bite, drank half a glass of juice and said he’d eat the rest later. Weeks afterwards, the cookies were still in his room — green with mold.
He couldn’t cook during the early years of our marriage but he can manage a pot of sinigang or adobo today. Not that he won’t make excuses to escape cooking. We have an agreement — I don’t cook on Sundays; he does. There were times when his cooking was inspired (like the time he cooked his steamed chicken). To encourage him, I even created a new category in my food blog — Daddy in the kitchen. But, after that, he would always have a reserved can of Spam for brunch on Sundays. Otherwise, we just ate out.
No, he’s not into cooking although he could make a living by being a food critic since he is so fussy about food at home. He won’t admit he is, though. His official statement is that he eats anything but that’s a lie. During summer last year, on a day when the heat was just so bad, I just threw some pork and soup in a pot. He said over dinner (that he hardly touched) that I didn’t have to cook if I didn’t feel like it; we could survive on sandwiches. That was his way of saying the food is lousy, please don’t cook anything like this again.
Speedy is a hoarder and he can be preachy. Friends call me a martyr for putting up with his snoring. He has faults and shortcomings. He isn’t a perfect man, husband or father. But he is my husband and I chose him to be the father of my children. Surely I did that because I saw something special in him — some uniquely wonderful qualities that overshadowed the imperfections.
So, Speedy, happy Father’s Day and happy birthday. You rock my world.
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[...] of cheese cookies I baked a long time ago that I surprised Speedy with. I already mentioned it in a previous entry and he’s been threatening to write about the whole story so I might as well publish my [...]
We feast everyday!
hi connie,
natatawa ako mag isa dito sa room while reading this post, patayin ang gripo huh…LOL
happy father’s day to your hubby.
btw, i cant get thru the registration process at pmn. will try again pag ok na.
O, di ba, classic? hahahahaha
Re PMN, we’re revamping the site kasi. We’ll open registration again after the revamp is complete.
Wala pa bang nadedeklarang “Husbands’ Day?”
I was torn between writing a blog about my own father and writing a blog about the father of my children. June 17 passed and I ended up writing blogs about flowers (Santacruzan and roses, check out http://quickline.blogspot.com).
I think I better start writing a blog for my husband’s birthday, that’s a month from now. I bet by the time I’m finished, we’ll be greeting him, Happy Birthday. I’ll just include a dash of fatherhood in it. Two in one hane?
Ami
Happy Father’s Day and Birthday to Speedy. His line about the gripo reminded me of my husband’s line when my water broke with our son: “cross your legs”. LOL. Oh Ok.
hahahahahahahahaha!!! katuwa, sana ako din may ganyan connie… pero alam mo naman masyado akong iyakin so wag na lang. muntik nakong maiyak! boohooohooo, pero nung binalikan ko ung gripo, hehe natawa uli ako, ang galing… Happy B-day & Father’s
Bro!
Belated happy father’s day to Speedy!
re: …he is so fussy about food at home. He won’t admit…
Just like my husband. When asked he’d say he eats anything, but it’s big fat lie. I think he considers 1-2 bites as “eating” anything.
LOL Ami, that is planning ahead.
Dexie hahahahaha Did you want to hit him too? LOL Happy father’s day to your very great adviser. Cross your legs… LOL
“…some uniquely wonderful qualities that overshadowed the imperfections…” What a sweet line
.
It’s great that he is a non-traditional Filipino guy when it comes to chores. Belated Happy Father’s Day to your one and only.
Richie!!!! Ngayon mo lang nalaman yung gripo episode, ano? Classic kapatid mo hahahaha Kelan ka uuwi??? happy father’s day to you too. Kisses from all of us.
*Richie is Speedy’s youngest brother.
Auee, happy father’s day to your hubby.
come to think of it, I don’t know of any man who’s not fussy about food although MOST claim that they can eat anything. My brother’s fussy with food, my father was too. All my brothers-in-law are the same. And all my other male friends too. 
Oh, and that includes my geekiest male friend.
Thanks, KK. If you ask Speedy though, he always say I’m “switik” rather than sweet. hahahaha Happy father’s day to your one and only too.
This was a fun read. May I say, I think he’s kenkoy.
Belated Happy Birthday and Happy Fathers’ Day to Speedy!
baka december nako makauwi, nagpapalaki kami ng mansion eh… bwahahahahahah!!!! husay ng mga article mo sis at napaka talented ng mga singkit kong pamangkins… dinadownload ko ung iba eh, minsan kailangan ko d2 sa trabaho ko hehehe! mwaahhh!!! ay laway!
Kongkong, oh yes he is. Pero kahit kenkoy minsan sarap sapakin hahahahaha
Thanks, Rhodora. Di pa rin ako maka-comment sa blog mo ha. Spammer daw ako.
Richie, alin pics nila Sam? naku sisingilin ka nung mga yun hahahaha Sige, kita tayo December.
aawww ang sweet!
O kaya ikaw, Mae, piliin mabuti ang lalaki. hehehehe Mahirap magsisisi.
Connie, basta mag comment ka lang, don’t make pansin the spammer thingie… I retrieve all comments anyway.
Belated Happy Father’s Day to your husband. Life is wonderful when we have someone to experience it with.
great post connie!!!!!